Thursday, September 29, 2011


Following the return of my family I have kept a much closer eye on all of them, especially Mum. They may have escaped once (thanks again to everyone at Air Canada, and all the koalas, for bringing my family back to me); I assure you it will never happen again.

In return for abiding by house rules, I have been promised to be brought on more outings - allowing me to see for myself what they do away from the superstructure. I will wear sweaters to disguise myself as some cute wiener dog.

Mum hasn't been well, which has worried me. Nothing can happen to her, she's too important to my plan..., and it's not time yet. I haven't left her bedside, doorside, footside. 

She seems to be misinterpreting this as "Love", or affection. Ridiculous [snort]. 
I'll play along because the snuggles are great, like any great spy would (right, James?) 
I actually think her assumption of love may work in my favour, get me closer. 

We already know how this story ends, and it certainly is not by infectious disease.
It just isn't time yet.

Until then, I will stay by her side, I will be cute, I will accept all the loving I am given and give back with some good ol' fashioned wiener dog smothering. She loves that - they all do.

Mr. Mustard

Tuesday, July 5, 2011

Attn HQ:

Evidence that I am an experienced hoverdog...
both on land, 
and on water.

Mr. Mustard (Superfly Wiener)

Friday, July 1, 2011

Attn HQ:

I pretended to be lazily laying in the warm grass, but really I was there to taste it.

At your service,
Mr. Mustard

Thursday, June 16, 2011

Attn HQ:

My assignment in the garden is bustling, but here I blossom under the sun, in the air. I am the garden dog. These are MY flowers. As you will learn I am very close to total garden possession.
I make my rounds, around the tomato plant, which is mine.
I stop to smell the flowers, which are mine.
I listen to my flowers, and keep watch over my flowers.
 Pretty soon I will fill all this space with more flowers for me...only me, all for me.
Around some of the larger flower beds Mum and Dad have erected a small fence - enough to deter and Basset Hound, and clear enough for a Golden Retriever to understand, but I am but a wiener dog...just a cute little wiener dog who sometimes loses my way and wanders though the fence.
I've discovered that by using my charm and small brown eyes I am able to avoid reprimand for crossing the garden border.
Soon ALL the garden flowers will be mine.